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An open letter to Hurricane Sandy...

Posted by on October 29, 2012

Dear Sandy,

On behalf of our American brothers, we're sorry. We know you're upset, and you have every right to be.

We know Americans put 6 billion tons of carbon dioxide into the atmosphere each year. We know most of that is absorbed by the ocean, which you seem to be protecting. We also know that the carbon dioxide imbalance intensifies storms like you.

We know that 3 billion tons of carbon dioxide are emitted by American automobiles each year. And yes, we know that a 3 cheeseburger-a-week habit chips in for another 1/2 ton per year, per American.

We all know Americans comprise 5% of the world population and emit 25% of the world's carbon dioxide pollution. And yes.. we know that's 5 times more than the rest of the world combined... but PLEASE, give them a break. They are changing their ways.

Between Obama, Vegans, and California's record high gas prices, they will find a way, just give them time. It takes YEARS to make a viably marketable electric car... and have you ever tried to give up meat? even for 1 week? Eventually our American brothers will learn the perils of hydraulic fracturing, discover innovative ways to sustain their lifestyles, and reconcile their mature economy with the environment... but in the mean time please spare them your destructive powers.

If, on the other hand you're just making your way to the New Jersey shoreline to put an end to that TV show, well then.. never mind.

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